If dependency is the goal, then weakness is the advantage.

Jesus rocked my world this summer.  I clung to Isaiah 55:11 from May 13th on.  "So is my word that goes out from my mouth.  It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it."  Again in Isaiah 14:24 it says "The Lord Almighty has sworn, 'surely, as I have planned, so it will be, and as I have purposed, so it will stand.'"  It's weird to think about every situation being purposed and knowing that everything the Lord wants to happen will happen.  Everything that He promises will come to pass because He is faithful.  So many times this summer I questioned my role and my purpose in my role.  My consistent prayer was that the Lord would make me "good" at my job.  I was in a leadership position at camp and I felt I had nothing to offer.  Every morning I would wake up begging God to make me adequate for the challenges I was to overcome.  Every single day the Lord provided the boldness and the strength and energy to do my job.  There came a point in the summer where I realized I didn't want to be "good" at my job because then I wouldn't need Jesus.  I have slowly grown to love my weaknesses because it forces me to cling to my God each day for the things I need to be successful and victorious in all that He has planned for me.

My friend Sarah Ellison put it perfectly; If dependency is the goal, then weakness is the advantage.  I don't ever want to be in a place where I am good at anything or capable of anything without the Creator of the universe.

Dependency is the state of relying on or being controlled by someone or something else.  It is being abnormally tolerant to and dependent on something that is habit-forming.  It is an over-reliance by a person on something.  The state of needing help.

This definition of dependency is beautiful to me because it paints a picture of what I want my dependency on Jesus to look like.  I want to overly rely on Him for everything.  How can we not depend on the very one who speaks what will come to pass?  The very words He says become life.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. ”Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."- 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Being at camp is like being on the top of a mountain with the Lord.  It is a pure and beautiful thing to be captivated by our King in a place where it is encouraged.  But we weren't created to live on the top of the mountain.  My boss, Lanie, spoke about our purpose to dwell and grow in the Valley.  At the top of the mountain you can see everything.  It is a place to put life into perspective.  But at the top of the mountain, nothing grows, because trees and life grow in the valley.

I am encouraged to thrive in the valley I'm in because I know that everything that happens has to go through the Lord's hands first.  It has to be spoken first because His words will not return to Him void.  I love waking up every morning begging the Lord to do with me what He wants.  Dependency is my goal and my weaknesses have become my advantage.

The Lord accomplished all that He planned for this summer and I believe that His word did not return back to Him empty.  Kids came to know Him this summer and the sweet gospel was shared.  People were healed, and restored.  People were set free, and given life.  I was stretched and molded and reminded that I don't have to be anyone but a Child of the Most High King.  I am now back in the valley and ready to do work for His kingdom in anxious anticipation of His coming.

A Burdened Heart.

I want the Lord to create in me a burdened heart.  In fact, I am begging God for a burdened heart.  When I hear the word burdened, I consider it a negative word.  It is certainly not a word to be taken lightly.  There are several definitions of burdened in the dictionary.  It is something that is carried.  It is something that is emotionally difficult to bear.  It is a source of great worry or stress; weight.  It is a responsibility or duty.

Sitting in my college apartment, I can look around at my closet that is full of clothes, my bed, my laptop, my college education, and most importantly my freedom in Christ that guarantees my salvation when I am finally called home to be with my sweet heavenly dad.

And while I take all of these things in, I beg for my heart to be burdened with a heart for the people that can't claim that hope and assurance that they are saved and treasured by the King.  The people that don't know Jesus.  It's hard for me to sit with all of my stuff my life and not be completely convinced that none of it matters if people in this world don't know the one person that does matter.

If my heart is burdened for the lost, then the lost are people that I carry on my heart.  Knowing that people are lost is something that is emotionally difficult to bear.  The lost are a source of great worry or stress (an urgency for them to know Jesus). The lost are a weight.  But most importantly, it becomes a responsibility or a duty to seek the lost.  I want my heart to be burdened like that.

If every single Christian in the world had a burdened heart for the lost, I don't think that there would be very many lost out there.  Sadly that isn't the case.  In Asia alone, less then 9% of the population know Jesus.  That means that roughly 3,797,785,607 people don't know Jesus on that continent alone.

Now I'm not saying that everyone should pack up and move to Asia to tell them about Jesus, (even though that would be legit).  Certainly there are people all around us that don't know Jesus and we are near them for a reason.  What I want is to be used by the Lord.

I know that the Lord uses those who are willing to be used.  I know that the Lord uses those that have a desire to be used.  Mine is burning.  Why He would use me, I have no idea.  I have nothing to offer, and I certainly don't deserve it.  But I am going to take the responsibility that He has given me as a believer, and run with it.  God will do the rest.

The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,
   because the LORD has anointed me
   to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
   to proclaim freedom for the captives
   and release from darkness for the prisoners,^[a]
2 to proclaim the year of the LORD’s favor
   and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
 ³ and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
   instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
   instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
   instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
   a planting of the LORD
   for the display of his splendor.----Isaiah 61


I started writing this to get my thoughts out about what the Lord has been teaching me, but I hope it encourages you in your purpose.  I want us to live with a sense of urgency.  If we know the truth then why aren't we sharing it?  Let's start asking God to burden our hearts for the lost and let Him do it.  Let's start praying for the nations, the people in our classes, our president, the sick, the broken, the weary, and the lost.  Let's actually share the gospel with the people we see everyday.  Let's start looking at things eternally and stop trying to think of how we can make ourselves comfortable.


I'm tired of being comfortable.  


So I pray that you will join me in the life of being uncomfortable for Jesus.  I pray that you will join me in being a prayer warrior for the lost.  Let's finish this commission together that God created us to live for in the first place.  Jesus is worth it!  The adventure is worth it!


I love you friends!

Unending Grace.

This summer I worked at Sky Ranch Christian Camp in Van, Texas.  Although I went there to serve and love kids, the Lord did more in my life then I thought possible.  It's funny how God works like that.  Being at camp was like living in heaven on earth.  We got to have fun and worship the Lord without any distractions or worldly things.  The kids that came to Sky Ranch called it the "sky high."  They catch on fire for Jesus at camp but when they go home it fades away and they fall into the way they were before.  Every girl that I talked to wanted to go home and be different.  They each wanted to serve the Lord passionately and not lose it.  I remember the worship song with the words, "when I come down the mountain and get back to my life, I wont settle for ordinary things.  I'm going to follow you forever, for all of my days, I won't rest until I see you again."


How many times do we promise ourselves that this time it will be different?  This time I will follow Jesus.  This time I won't give into to temptation.  This time will be the last time.


When we come into a relationship with the creator of the universe we become a new creation.  We become beautiful butterflies, and we are transformed out of being the gross caterpillar that was once confined to the dirt.  The Lord allows us to fly in our freedom.  But one thing that was constant with my girls at camp were the feelings of worthlessness and failure.  Failure to be "perfect" and maintain the "sky high."  The Lord revealed to me just HOW MUCH grace He has for us.  He already paid for every sin that we will commit and every mistake that we will make.  We are clean, perfect, forgiven butterflies.  So why are we still sitting in our mess on the ground?  Why are we still confining ourselves to the ground when we now have the ability to fly?  We fly in freedom and in grace.  The Lord has given me a free gift that I do not deserve and I could never repay.  So this mindset that I have to repay Him by being perfect just stabs the grace out of the gift.  Jesus just wants me to love Him and give Him all of me.  Not by my works so that I cannot boast in earning anything.


Galatians 5:4-6 says "You who are trying to be justified by law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace.  But by faith we eagerly await through the Spirit the righteousness for which we hope.  For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision has any value.  The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love."


I don't know about you but I don't want to fall away from grace because I'm too busy working for it.  I want to sprint towards it and never let go!  God just wants my faith and my love and my life.  He doesn't ask me to obey rules to earn His love because I can't.  I want to express my faith through love because that is all that God is, love.  Is there a better way to worship God who is love then to be love and give love the way that Jesus did for us?


God doesn't need us but He WANTS us!  I want to walk in His grace for the rest of my life and never again become a slave to sin, a slave to works and rules.  I want to experience everything that God has for my life and for me.  If you have felt the burden of trying to live by rules and laws, and you are missing out on the grace that is freely being poured over you, I would encourage you to get back in it!!  Grace is why we are saved, period.  Allow God to take you out of your mess and wash you in His love.  His desire is for you and YOU belong to HIM!

Israel's Only Savior

¹ "But now, this is what the LORD says—
   he who created you, Jacob,
   he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
   I have summoned you by name; you are mine. ² When you pass through the waters,
   I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
   they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
   you will not be burned;
   the flames will not set you ablaze. ³ For I am the LORD your God,
   the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I give Egypt for your ransom,
   Cush and Seba in your stead. ⁴ Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
   and because I love you,
I will give people in exchange for you,
   nations in exchange for your life."-Isaiah 43:1-4






This passage has completely opened my eyes to the truths of God's immense love for us.  The first thing that God says is that He has summoned us by name.  The definition of summon is to authoritatively or urgently call on.  How cool is it that God calls us by our names to come to Him?  I think of it as if God is saying "Reagan I am urgently calling for you!"  He will be with us always and through everything, the fire, storms, water, even when we are walking on solid ground.  I have always known that "God was there," but I never completely lived as if He was living inside of me.  As I finish my freshmen year of college, I look back on everything that I have learned and it is more then I could ever even have imagined.  This year the Lord has urgently called for me to live for Him and it has been the experience of a lifetime and I will never go back!  Just like this passage says, I have gone through the rivers but they have not washed over me.  I have gone through the fires but I have not been burned.  I am precious in the Lord's sight and because He loves me He says He will give men in exchange for my life!!   


Today I was looking through my brother's national geographic magazine and the article was about the world's tallest trees.  This pictures were incredible of the 300 foot trees.  They were absolutely breath-taking!!  A lot of people can see God's beauty through nature.  I see how huge God is compared to the hugest things.  If MY GOD created a 300 foot tree, He must be HUGE.  If my God made the biggest mountains, he is still much bigger.  So who am I to think that my life and my problems matter?  But they do to God.  He loves me and will give anything for me to seek and call after Him.  And what is stopping us sometimes?  God created everything.  He is funnier then the funniest person I know.  God is HILARIOUS!  He is more loving then the most loving person I know.  Because He created them.  He created me.  This fact alone should make us want to THROW our lives at him and allow him to control it all.  If He knows whats going to happen and whats best then why would we ever want to do anything on our own??


What are you holding onto, big or small, that God is asking you to trust him with?  Are you willing to give it away and rest in the lap of our daddy?  The only one who will always be faithful?


This week at church we looked at the passage in Matthew where Peter steps out of the boat and walks on the water towards Jesus.  While this passage is so important in understanding trust and being able to surrender, I picked out something I had never thought about before.  Paul ASKS Jesus to ask him to get out of the boat and walk on the water!!  How many times have we ever ASKED God to challenge us to step out in faith when we could surely fall?  I think that the Sweet Lord wants us to want to be uncomfortable for his glory.  If we are comfortable in our faith then we have settled and we are missing out!!


Today, ask God to test you, ask God to challenge you in an area that you never even thought about.  Then leap out of the boat and run towards the father!  YOU WILL NOT FAIL!  He will be right there with you and when you reach him he will wrap his arms around you.


Hope everyone is having a blessed week.  I love you all so much!!

God is in the Dominican Republic!

Over spring break I was blessed with the opportunity to travel to the Dominican Republic on a mission trip with Campus Crusade for Christ!  The University of Santo Domingo has 171,000 students, many of which do not understand the love of Jesus or the free gift of eternity that we can have through Him.  We went on the campus everyday and shared the gospel with students.  The entire trip was completely moved by God and so I want to give Him glory by sharing about my week.  


Saturday March 5, 2011 (Prayer from a week before the trip)


God, thank you so much for this trip and the opportunities you have given each of us.  I thank you that you are faithful and we are believing that all of the money will come through because it is your will for the gospel to be delivered around the world.  I thank you for the deep friendships that are going to be made on this trip and that we will build one another up and encourage each other.  I pray for the staff in the DR, that we would just bring them an ocean of joy and encouragement that only comes from you.  God I just want you to use us to do great things for your glory.  Your word says that you open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing.  God our desire is to know you in a deeper way and to be used to further your kingdom.  So use us and blow us away!  You are so great and we can't wait to see what you are going to do.  We declare safety and protection on this trip because we know that no weapon formed against us shall prosper.  I thank you that people are going to come into your family and have a personal relationship with you.  I ask for boldness and speech that does not falter.  We rebuke the devil in the name of Jesus because we know that when we resist him he has to flee.  Thank you for your grace and mercy.  Thank you for providing a way for us to live eternally with you because we know that you are the only way, the only truth, and the only light.  Fill everyone with the power of the Holy Spirit and the ability to live a victorious life that only comes from knowing you.  Give us opportunities to truly love your people the way you love us.  Show us a part of you that we have never seen before and stretch us to a point where we are uncomfortable for you.  It wasn't comfortable for you to die on the cross, so help us learn to be uncomfortable and radical for you.  Make us radically in love with you and who you are.  Make us more like you because we are so awful without you.  Thank you that you know the number of hairs on our head.  Thank you for knowing what we are going to do in five years, and when we are going to take our last breath.  You say that where 2 or 3 gather together in your name, there you are in their midst.  Well there are 35 of us gathered together so I pray that you would be with us and in our midst the entire trip and before and after.  Please humble me and help me to know how worthless I really am and how much I deserve death even right this second.  Give me a new understanding of what your love is and how much it cost you.  Lord it was free but it wasn't cheap.  Your sacrifice was, is, and is to come the greatest sacrifice.  You are the name above all names.  You are Yahweh, El Shaddai, El Roi, The God who sees us in our pit and picks us up out of it.  If all of these things are true, then who can be against us?!  You are the creator of the universe and you are on our side!  We love you so much!  AMEN!

The trip stretched me in many ways.  I learned to be willing and obedient in my faith and I saw a boldness in myself that I had never seen before while sharing my faith.  I learned that success is not necessarily getting someone saved, it is being willing to be used by God and leaving the results up to Him.  I learned that my words are powerful and my prayers WILL be answered when I ask in faith.  In Matthew 21:21-22 Jesus says “I tell you the truth, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to this fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done.  If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.”  I lived off of this verse that week and it has changed my life even today.  Every morning I prayed in faith that God would do great things through me and let me lead people to accept Him.  I had the opportunity to lead six college students from the Dominican Republic to Christ, and talked about Jesus with countless others!  God is always faithful and He never fails to blow me away.  Its so cool to know that God WILL do exceedingly and abundantly above all that we can ask or think! ALWAYS!

Another thing that was so cool was how God tested our patience and trust in Him through time and money.  We were supposed to be home Sunday night and we weren't expecting to have and money left on the last day of the trip.  But on Sunday when we walked into the airport, we found out we wouldn't be home until Monday night.  The cool thing was that for some reason we had a ton of extra money left over- out of no where!!  We spent the day at the aquarium eeeekk fishies!!!

Basically God is AMAZING and this trip rocked my world!! Start praying for BIG, SPECIFIC things and watch God move in a way exceedingly and abundantly above all that you could ask or think! Love you guys!

The Furious Longing of God

Brennan Manning, the author of "The Furious Longing of God" writes this... "Someone once said, If a man would learn to pray, let him go to sea."

Numerous times throughout the bible we read about furious storms at sea.  The story of Jonah, or even Jesus calming the storm.  These storms often brought fear of death and danger.  In the story of Jonah, God brought a storm to bring Jonah back to him when he tried to run away.  This little girl tells the story perfectly and she's awesome!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4VrujheblY

Oftentimes we have to go through a fierce storm in order to turn to God in prayer.  The kind of prayer that exhibits a furious longing for God.  How many times I go through fierce storms is impossible to count.  But God rules the wind and the seas and He sees us through our hurt and shame.  Song of Songs 7:10 says "I belong to my lover, and his desire is for me."

God is telling us something through all of the storms in the bible.

Mark 4:35-40 "On that day, when evening had come, he said to them, "Let us go across to the other side." And leaving the crowd, they took him with them in the boat, just as he was. And other boats were with him. And a great windstorm arose, and the waves were breaking into the boat, so that the boat was already filling. But he was in the stern, asleep on the cushion. And they woke him and said to him, "Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?" And he awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, "Peace! Be still!" And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. He said to them, "Why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith?"

God's desire is for us.  He is so in love with us and he LONGS for us to draw close to Him.  He longs for us to pray with a furious longing that cannot be satisfied with the things of the world.


Knowing that God's desire is for ME, I am learning to turn to God in everything, not just the storms.  He WANTS to hear about my day and He wants to know about my friends and my grades and all of my dreams.  Take a moment to talk to your dad.  You belong to Him and His desire is for you!

Merry Christmas, HE Lives On The Inside Of Me!

I discovered a TV show called "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant."  (Now before you freak out and close this page just hear me out I promise I have a point!)  The show is about women who go nine months of their lives not knowing they are pregnant until they go into labor and birth a child.  If you are like me, this probably blows your mind because I can not bring myself to understand how this happens, but it does!  As crazy as this sounds, God really spoke to me through this show...


We shouldn't have to deliver a baby to know that we were pregnant.


We shouldn't have to SEE God to know that He lives on the inside of us.


When we enter into a relationship with the Creator of the universe, God's spirit enters into our hearts to live on the inside of us.  Although we can not physically feel this, our lives begin to reflect the work being done on our hearts.  We see this through faith and we feel God's love.  So why do so many of us live as if we are waiting for God to move and do His part before we do anything?

John 14:16-18 "And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever— the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you.  I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you."

We need to stop living as if we are clueless! When we reach the judgement day and God asks us why we didn't follow Him are we going to say "I didn't know you were living on the inside of me to help me"?

If you ever talk to a pregnant woman, you can't help but notice the abundant joy on her face.  She knows that what is inside of her is special and it is apart of her and she can't explain the overwhelming love that she has for something that she has never even seen.  And she can't help but show it off!

Shouldn't our love for Christ be like that?  I want my face to express abundant joy because I know WHO is on the inside of me, even though I can't see Him.  I want to SHOW IT OFF because I want everyone else to have that abundant joy!

"Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in your midst?" 1 Corinthians 3:16


And just like a new mother nurtures her child, we need to nurture our hearts with the Word of God. 


Jesus was born this Christmas night some 2000 years ago so that He could die to live on the inside of us.  Isn't it exciting to know that He WANTS to be with us all of the time??  As you spend Christmas with your family and friends, remember that not only is Christmas celebrating the birth of Christ, but also what He was born FOR.  He knew long before the earth began that we needed a savior.


Lets start our new year declaring to live with the abundant joy that God fills us with.  Let us show off what is on the inside of us.  After all, what fun is it in not knowing?


Merry Christmas, I love you all.